Welcome to the Library! This way is the information desk, where you can find answers to all of your questions. Can you tell the difference between the true questions and the false (i.e. made-up) questions?

1)"Can you point me to the religion section? I need to do an autobiography on God."
2)"Can you show me on the map where Hippopotamus, New York is? (Librarian: Do you mean Buffalo, New York? Patron: Oh yeah, I knew it was some large animal.)
3)"Do you work here?" (Librarian is sitting at the desk after having just finished a phone reference question.)
4)"My son is really intelligent. Can you find me a version of Kafka's Metamorphoses for a very advanced first grader?"
5)"Can you help me find a chapter book on water-pollution in the Industrial Age of America?"
6)"What does 'Storytime sign-ups begin February 20th' mean....? But can I sign up now?"
7)"In what month is the Fourth of July?"
8)"Would you go to dinner with me?"
9)"What does ON ORDER mean?"
10) "What do you mean, the children's room is geared for children? Adults have rights too!"

Answers: 1)False (2)True (3)True (4)False (but you can get a chapter book about a cockroach who turns into a boy. It's called Shoebag, by Mary James, aka M.E. Kerr.)
(5)True (6)True (7)False (but very close to True.) (8)True (9)True (10) True

If you answered 8-10 right: Way to go! You must be married to a librarian, or have one as a good friend. Huzzah for you!
7-5: It's time to polish up that library card and hang out at your local library. At the very least, you'll get some good material for stories.
4-1: Don't be hard on yourself-- some of the questions are pretty wild.
Less than 1: Wow! You haven't hung out with enough librarians.Go drinking or dancing with a group some evening, and you'll discover many of the wild, weird and wacky anecdotes that make life at the information desk so unusual!